Are you Driving?
May 20, 2023
Are you taking the wheel of life as a Driver or are you a Passenger?
This is an interesting question and a necessary one that every one of us consciously or unconsciously asks at some point in life. Being a passenger is the easy way to live life and most of the time one finds themself in that seat wondering how they got there. It can be a slow fade, waking up one day looking at the 15 pounds that "suddenly" packed on to your frame, deflecting responsibility to the dryer randomly shrinking your jeans. Or the vague disconnect you feel in some of your most important relationships. It's the little decisions we choose not to make that stack up leaving us wondering where this vehicle is taking us in life. Sometimes it's forces outside of our control like an illness or other life changing fork in the road where we simply don't have the energy to drive. Regardless the cause, the effect is giving up control of the direction in life. We tend to be very hard on ourselves, usually being our own worst critic.
What story are you telling yourself? What's the narrative spinning in your mind? We typically beat ourselves up for allowing our life to be driven by someone or something else. Yet, we often fail to realize it's not being the passenger that's the issue. It's the fact that we're not asking the most important questions....
- Am I a passenger in this vehicle right now? Why?
- What am I going to do about it?
This is the difference between those living an impactful, fulfilled life and those who resign themselves to the passenger seat. The more frequently we become self-aware of our current position in life, the quicker we can make small adjustments to keep our life moving in the right direction. It's not about perfection or being the driver all the time. There are times we need to breathe, heal, re-focus or just rest for a season. That's okay. But be intentional about who's directing the course of your life.
Matthew Kelly coined a famous and relevant guiding motto in his book "The Long View":
"Most people overestimate what they can do in a day, and underestimate what they can do in a month. We overestimate what we can do in a year, and underestimate what we can accomplish in a decade."
The highest rung of what's possible for you is far beyond the world you can see right now. Sometimes it takes bringing other people into the conversation to help you see yourself from the outside-in. Maybe a friend, a mentor, a spouse or even finding a mastermind or hiring a coach. Regardless what it takes to get you back into the driver's seat, become very intentional about frequently asking yourself these critical questions to guide the trajectory of your life:
- Am I the driver or passenger of my life right now? Why?
- What am I going to do about it?